Sam’s mom was in the kitchen doing what she would typically do for the whole family. Preparing something yummy on this occasion chocolate cake. After entering into the kitchen, Sam asked his mom if she wanted some help. Her invitation was needing help cracking an egg. Handing the egg to Sam she told him what to do. As Sam cracked the egg it fell onto the floor. His mom graciously gave him another egg and in the second attempt Sam was able to crack the egg into the mixing bowl. While mom mixed the cake, Sam cleaned the mess on the floor with joy. As an adult looking back on this experience Sam spoke about his interest in cooking growing from what his mom taught him. Never once did he ever sense any condemnation, he was free to make a mistake and learn from it. Cooking was an affirming experience growing from the kindness of mom’s heart. We can see in this brief picture the power and goodness of compassionate love taking place through kindness and patience.

Whenever Sam disappointed his dad all that Sam really new was his dad’s anger and physical punishment. Sam’s dad was not kind, nor was he patient. Instead Sam’s dad was demanding and punitive in ways that laid a foundation of stressful expectation, “Don’t you dare disappointment me.”  Sam said he grew up living a life where he never allow himself a freedom to fail.  Whenever he did fail, Sam said, “I hid my failures from others with great fear of how others would respond to his mistakes.” Sam turned into a turtle when faced with criticism.  He hid inside a protective shell where no one could hurt him.  Sam went on to say, ” I never let anyone really get to know me out of a fear that if someone really knew me they would not care for or love me.”

Kindness caries great power for good. A person’s heart is encouraged through caring diligence in times of disappointment. Allowing a person the freedom to fail and to learn from their failures takes a child down a road of confidence.  Fight for what is good!